Just Overwhelm Me

On the heels of my acceptance letter, I received a rejection. I'm thinking it might be because they wanted the poem that the Minnesota Review picked up, because right after the rejection, I got another email (I had sent them notice that that poem needed to be withdrawn from their pile) that said that this particular poem was my strongest one in the bunch and closest to getting into theirs. As far as magazine popularity goes, I think I got the better deal.

Then they told me I have a lovely voice.

I really don't like when people try to sugarcoat saying no. Just say no. I don't believe any compliment that comes after a rejection anyway.

I mean, should you? It obviously wasn't a lovely enough voice. So it's a lovely voice, but it's meant to sing for someone else. It's like saying, "You're on to something." I think that translates pretty easily into, "You suck, but you may improve in the future." I know this sounds really bitter, but I'm writing it with a smile on my face, I swear. My pity party typically only lasts for five minutes after the rejection and ends/is soothed by one scream of rage before I pick myself up and go on. :P Sometimes it just helps you feel better to make fun of the corny rejection letters that are trying to bandaid your feelings.
Anywho, I'm super looking forward to Monday, when I'll get to go and spend the night in Murray with my mentor, Carrie, and two of my other very dear friends.  Even though I am absolutely terrified of the prospect of getting up and reciting a poem from memory, I will deal just to get to spend a day with these people. Hopefully the night won't be cut short by me blacking out and face-planting in humiliation. =) Dream big.

Then, then, then!! Just two weeks till Disney World!! Yes, please. Especially since, after churning out all this work, I'm starting to hit a rut again. I need a vacation. I need mindless, childhood fun. That way I can regroup and be ready to kick butt during my thesis semester with Blas. Next Spring, I'll be going to Murray to read a whole group of my own poems after (Succesfully, I hope) defending my thesis. I can't believe it's all almost over. =( I don't want to leave.

Anyway, I'll leave my readers (hopefully I am correct in using the plural) with a bit of music. I love this song. I love the sound, I love the lyrics, and I even love the music video, which is just a bunch of random objects spiraling like they're caught in the eye of a storm. I love a song that can envoke images and ideas in my mind. If I ever turned one of my poems into a song, I would want it to sound like this:

What if this storm ends?
And I don't see you
As you are now
Ever again

The perfect halo
Of gold hair and lightning
Sets you off against
The planet's last dance

Just for a minute
The silver forked sky
Lit you up like a star
That I will follow

Now it's found us
Like I have found you
I don't want to run
Just overwhelm me

What if this storm ends?
And leaves us nothing
Except a memory
A distant echo

I want pinned down
I want unsettled
Rattle cage after cage
Until my blood boils

I want to see you
As you are now
Every single day
That I am living

Painted in flames
All peeling thunder
Be the lightning in me
That strikes relentless